Does our need to connect make us less "social" in the end?

I guess since as someone born before the internet became a “thing”, I have fallen into and out of the social media trap more than once or twice. Every time I find it’s because I was using it wrong. The owners of the big social media companies all probably started out thinking that social media would be a place for big ideas. But as we can see, big ideas don’t come from social media, they come, quite often from structured work. Social media is not just about being flashy and addictive; it is flashy and addictive, but not because it connects us to more people, but because it allows us to create groups, and associations, which ultimately polarize and then separate us instead. Humans have this unique ability to conduct personal experiments socially in ways that no other animals do. And the internet just lets us do that more often and quickly now. Competing for likes on a TikTok video or whatever is just one of many experiments we do almost daily. Often just counting likes as a sign you have increased your standing in a group. Without realizing that the experiment is slowly changing who we really are IRL (In Real Life).

What does this have to do with software quality? Well not much aside from when you think about how social media platforms let us conduct so many of these experiments. But are our experiments done each day by posting a photo of a cat or posting a political option in a tweet (politics moved online in case you never noticed, almost nobody talks politics on the street) …experiments being controlled by you, or controlled by the platform? It’s probably impossible to test that idea, but if you were to try, you would be probably looking at AI an ML that drive so much of our digital interactions. Are we really in the final analysis letting machines tell us how we should be or act? If that is remotely true, I hope, that people can use it as a get-out-of-jail card, an excuse if you like to disconnect, and reset, and be more social. In real life.

(disclaimer not being deep here, just like to be able to recognize that humans are complex, but we also crave bacon, even if that’s not logical.)



I’m not a big social media fan. I’m not social at all actually… Like I got facebook but only because of someone pushed me to make it once, I’m not active at all, I don’t do endless scrolling. When I see people go on tiktok and see those video I can only think 'wtf is going on with society" (no offence to anyone here watching tiktok vids XD) The kind of entertainment they provide in return for a donation is absurd. I mean it works glad for them.

I think the new generation is becoming a bit more dumber and more social media focused. And yes we should focus on that from a company side, because tech is evolving and people also.
We like to make applications idiot-proof but hey, they are becoming better idiots :stuck_out_tongue:

Their expectations of luxury is increasing by the day. It has to look fancy otherwise it’s a scam. etc…

We already are. When the product is free, you are the product. Facebook ads will be burned into your mind, next time you’re at the shop you’ll remember a certain product just because of this ad and you might pick it.


Golden on @kinofrost . I am also guessing you are a follower of the a_single_bear account on the bird platform? Love having a thing come up in the feed that stops me doom-scrolling, searching for that next dopamine hit that never comes. I love it when people show that there is light out there in the web.
For everyone else who wants to listen to a podcast on the social mechanics that was behind my post


FB also became quite Meh for me of late Kristof. Like a demanding child, but is still great for seeing what goes on at opposite ends of the globe both geographically and socially. Digital enabled so many connections, and we may have smashed Dunbars Number using it, but not sure it helps.
Since we really want not just support, but really also seek validation through being able to help or support others; but in a way that we control, not by giving using a long distance charity over a piece of copper wire. We give to 2 charities every month, I keep forgetting this. So every time someone new comes along as asks for money I keep reminding myself that I already do give; and decide instead to give not my likes, or my money, but rather to give my time. And subtly I’m making that step because I want to meet people who also prefer to rather give time and physical energy rather than mental energy.

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